By Cindy Walker Burton

A door mat is for wiping feet. It traps dirt, dust and debris. Occasionally, it is shaken violently to remove such debris. A door mat may greet you with a cheery “Welcome.” Sometimes, it is changed for seasonal purposes. Day in and day out, a door mat lies obediently with one primary purpose: to be stepped upon. It does not move independently. It bears the weight of the person who steps on it. Does a door mat remind you of someone you know?

When Nancy Sinatra belted out her 1960s hit, “These Boots Were Made for Walkin’,” she didn’t mean for walking on a door mat. She sang, “One of these days these boots are gonna walk over you.” She was referring to a woman summoning the courage to walk all over the guy who was using her as a door mat. Nancy was ahead of her time with that type of forward thinking. Using the door mat analogy, it’s a fact that men and women allow themselves to be door mats who don’t think independently, bear the weight of their significant other, occasionally get shaken, sometimes get “traded out” for a new door mat and get stepped on daily. I refer to this type of submissive behavior as Door Mat Syndrome. Simply put, you allow yourself to be a door mat; it’s a choice. No one ever says, “When I grow up, I wanna be a door mat.” Here are countermeasures to dump the Door Mat Syndrome.

First, don’t allow yourself to be used, abused, taken for granted or taken advantage of. Distance yourself from the person who’s enjoying stepping on you. Remove the shirt on your back that reads “Kick Me” and replace it with one that says “I Rule.“ Remove the sign from your forehead that flashes “Use me!“ Practice random acts of self assertiveness. Respect yourself. Raise your standards and lower your inhibitions. Surround yourself with positive people, not toxic people. Love the skin you’re in! Stop subjecting yourself to mistreatment, malfeasance, manipulation, and malice. Where there’s a will, there’s a way, so kick your will into high gear and make way for changes! A door mat is for wiping feet. Do you really want footprints all over you? I didn’t think so. Dump the Door Mat Syndrome.